Helplessly, I walk down the shore..tired nervous paces making their way to nowhere.
Every trace of my footsteps on this dead sand is a tiring memory from a past I have never chosen, and it is like someone else is making those steps on strong Anna’s behalf…
Before my eyes lies an empty destination. No wonder why I have ran out of any kind of feeling…
The word “Empty” echoes in my head, maybe I should stop, maybe I should just lay down here and give up on any bit of life that’s left in me..
The sound of the sea breaks the silence around me; so loud and clear as if the waves of the ocean are crushing into my soul.
Looking around, I ask myself why…. why do I make those strange decisions?…. why do I always think that the word “safety” means “loneliness” ?
I see a flashback of the past, the past that means one thing…him, and I stop at the sight of his smirking smile in my head…
They told me once that the sea is a good secret keeper, you can tell it all your secrets, and they will still be secrets….
After he paralyzed me with love and heartache, it is the right time to move on, the right time to be free again…
I move my feet before they indulge deeper in sand’s grave, “Flee” the sea whispers…first step towards that blue world. Second step, my feet are moving faster now..third step…
I feel those smooth cold waves washing him out of my mind, I am floating…. a picture of him sinking down strikes into my heart, and I enjoy it…
My senses are wide awake as the sea slowly drinks me, I am no longer paralyzed, and I know that I am alive now. There isn’t going to be a long time before I run out of life, but it is going to be just fine…
This cold water is mixed with my soul now, and I feel it becoming a part of this big blue world….
The sea holds my free body gently, and lies it there on the shore…as a reminder that I was alive once without him ….
Until another life,
Love Always,